Reality Check: A Coaching Package for Anybody Who Wants to Get Real and Get Moving

“The impact of Oli’s coaching has been very significant and had an almost profound impact on my life. We explored me finding a more real and genuine version of who I was which resulted in me developing a new look, dating someone for the first time in four years and, most significantly, me leaving my job of eleven years to explore a different path in life.”
-Client Testimonial

Short Short Version:

Reality Check is a coaching package (8 sessions) for anybody who has reached a stage where they’re ready to step up and start being real with themselves.

It is based on the assumption that reality is always preferable to comfortable illusions when it comes to getting the RESULTS that you want.

Through a creative exploration and accountability process, we’ll look at yourself, the world, and reality and help you help yourself take meaningful steps to get where you wanna be.

“Oli handled firmly held limiting beliefs with persistence and sensitivity that lead to many moments of personal insight.”
-Client Testimonial

Short Version:

The Reality Check is a challenging coaching package helping creative and ambitious people to develop a better connection to themselves, the world, and reality by solving the problem of turning real values and passions into purpose.

If you feel disconnected from yourself and your real goals and you want to feel a renewed sense of self-acceptance and purpose, then the Reality Check is exactly what you need.

The Reality Check package will walk you through a step-by-step process that allows you to test your assumptions about yourself, the world, and reality, fine-tune your Bullshit Detector, and stop holding yourself back because of ill-perceived internal and external barriers.

Through a series of exploratory coaching conversations, we will use traditional coaching techniques and tools along with the practical and philosophical elements of Personal Revolutions: A Short Course in Realness to look at your life from the inside out and figure out what you can do to start moving in a positive direction that allows you to grow more real.

The Reality Check will increase your awareness of yourself and allow for more confidence, more acceptance, better relationships with yourself and others, and a commitment to continuous daily action that makes a positive difference to your life instead of keeping you stuck where you don’t wanna be.

Here’s what you’ll get at a bare minimum:

  • 3.5 months of structured support towards building awareness of yourself, the world, and reality and taking strategic action based on what you learn.
  • An initial 90 minute one-on-one ‘Jump Start’ Reality Check coaching session.
  • 7 one hour sessions using seven core realities as a springboard into contextualised coaching about your own life (see ‘long version’ below for more details).
  • E-book versions of Personal Revolutions: A Short Course in Realness.
  • Email support in between sessions for the duration of the coaching process.
  • ‘Homework’ to keep you on track.
  • Access to 12 MP3 recordings of the Personal Revolutions Podcast covering various areas of realness.

If you commit to the process you’ll also get:

  • A better understanding of the fundamental cause of your problems, practical solutions, and clear momentum towards living your unlived life and making your dreams a reality.

Get in touch now and arrange a quick chat to see if we can work together:

“The coaching techniques Oli used helped raise my awareness and change certain unhealthy unconscious behaviour for the better.”
-Client Testimonial

Keep reading below if you want the ‘long version’ of what the Reality Check is all about:

Who am I, what am I about, and why should you care about working with me?

My name is Oli Anderson and I like to work in areas that look at how we can: 1) improve our relationships with ourselves, the world, and reality, and, 2) help us to uncover our truth so that we can translate it into meaningful action and live the best lives possible for ourselves. I like to do this because I hate to see people bringing unnecessary complications to their lives and making themselves more miserable than they need to be.

Short version: You’re either ‘happy’ because you’re living a real life, or you’re miserable because you’re living an unreal one. My job is to help you help yourself determine the real from unreal and then act on this learning.

I believe (and know from study and experience) that changing our lives is simply a process of, firstly, uncovering the truth, and, secondly, living this truth.  Though this is a simple process, when we break it down, it can be difficult to live and breathe it – especially in an unreal world that is designed to take away our power and to distract us from ourselves and what’s truly important. Sometimes, we need a little support and accountability to explore our options and stay on track. That’s where I come in.

My mission – if you wanna call it that – is to help people fine-tune their ‘Bullshit Detectors’ and to become more aware of the ways in which they’re holding themselves back from themselves (and so the world, by extension). If you’re not listening to your real, inner voice then you’re listening to some bullshit and chances are it’s messing your life up (or at least taking it off course).

Everybody knows that the biggest battle is within but what we often forget is that we can stop fighting it whenever we want: all we have to do is stop believing the bullshit we’ve been conditioned to take on board about ourselves, the world, and reality and to build on a foundation of truth instead. Once we’ve done this and dedicate ourselves to continuous action instead of just talking about our problems then everything else falls into place.

Really, all most of us want is to stop caring about the things that don’t ‘matter’ but which we allow to hold us back (usually for emotional reasons). This coaching package is designed to support you through your own ‘Reality Check’ so that you can start to tell what really matters to you and what doesn’t. By the end of it, you’ll have a better understanding of who you are, what you value, and how you can use this information about yourself to ‘make your values valuable to others’ and design a purpose that connects you to yourself and the world via something real.

It won’t be easy and it’s not supposed to be, but if you really want to change the way you think about yourself and you’re ready to commit yourself to a new course of action, then working with me on this is the opportunity you’ve been waiting for.

I’m a fully qualified coach (with a shiny diploma certificate from the Coaching Academy) and have worked with people from all walks of life. As the author of Personal Revolutions: A Short Course in Realness and some other books I’ve proven that I can get things ‘done’ and I also have a great deal of experience working in mental health (supporting those with depression and anxiety to more serious, trauma-induced problems like hearing voices) and management and leadership positions in the public and private sectors. My work has also been used to inform a number of innovative design projects and networks around the world.

Not that it matters that much, but I’ve been living with kidney failure for the last twelve years (and counting – waiting for a transplant) so I know what it’s like to live a life on the edge and have to fight every day to make life worth living. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that no matter how hard things seem externally, if we can get the inner mind-set right – and align ourselves with reality, instead of with our fear, pride, or emotional desires about it – then we can build a life that allows us to express ourselves in a real way and take significant action in the world. Nothing can hold you back if you know yourself and you know reality.

I’ve already coached clients from all over the world around specific goals but the ‘Reality Check’ package has been designed to allow me to dig deeper by bringing everything I’ve learned over the years into focus and help you give yourself a quick, sharp, burst of reality in the most efficient way possible.

If you want to take yourself to the next level of who you already are and who you can be, you need to improve your relationship with reality, because reality is the only solid foundation you can build on. Get in touch and we can have a free reality-scoping call to see if it’s worth us working together to kick-start the process of helping you step into your real life, not a pale imitation of it.

Reality Check coach Oli Anderson, author of Personal Revolutions: A Short Course in Realness(photo credit:  Matt Essam)
Here I am sitting in a cave, looking all serious and waiting to speak to you.

“Oli asked amazing questions that made me think about things in different perspectives. Looking at things how I’d never seen them before really helped me see life differently and made me make decisions I would have never thought possible.”
-Client Testimonial

What is the ‘Reality Check’ coaching package? Why should anybody care? What are the expected results/outcomes?

This three-and-a-half month coaching package is designed to help you give yourself the kick in the pants that you need to take back control of yourself and your life. It will help you to start exploring possibilities for what most matters to you and create realistic strategies for getting to where you truly want to be. All of this is founded on the idea that ‘action is the only cure for anything’.

This isn’t about just filling your head with information (it’s not another ‘course’); it’s about helping you determine the best action for you to take to move in the direction of your realest possible life.

Ultimately, we will be taking a look at helping you to identify with your realest self – not the version of ‘You’ that you’ve currently been conditioned to live as in confusion, restlessness, or misery.  If you feel that something is missing from your experience of yourself, or that you’ve somehow become disconnected from who you are, then this package is going to help you. Guaranteed.

We will use rational, proven methods to get you out of your head and back into your real life. This isn’t some mystical nonsense or overly-optimistic attempt at ‘motivating’ you or helping you deal with your mummy and daddy issues by endlessly ‘talking’ about them: it’s about exploring your relationship with the truth and translating it into action (by guiding you into looking at the truth through the lens of your own experience and critical understanding, not telling you what it is).

Through this process of taking action, we will work together to keep you accountable and keep you on track so that by the end of the three months you’ll be building the right kind of momentum to get to where you need to be. Once we’re done, you’ll know where you’re headed and will feel confident enough to keep taking yourself there without the stabilisers on.

This may involve asking yourself some difficult questions; it might mean that you have to stop identifying with certain cherished untruths; it might mean changing the direction you’ve set for yourself because you realise it was actually determined by society or your parents or your ‘ego’ (which was created by your conditioning and shame about yourself, not ‘You’).  It definitely means sorting yourself out and reclaiming certain truths about who you are – not everybody is ready for this (and there’s no shame in that).

Essentially, what is being ‘taught’ in this coaching package is a process of unlearning all of the things that stop us from accepting ourselves: Unlearning the doubts and insecurities about ourselves that prevent us from living what’s true to who we are and our values (actually true, not what we want to be true); unlearning the limiting beliefs that keep us from the world, or stop us from changing it, because we think things are ‘fixed’ when they’re not; unlearning our ideas about what’s ‘realistic’ because we’ve been told that we need to live small or mediocre lives and to just play a role in somebody else’s plans or go along with the crowd.

All of this bullshit is something that you have been taught; we need to work together to help you come from a stance of teaching yourself based on what’s true about yourself, the world, and reality: The Reality Check coaching package is an exploration of your relation to these three areas and an implementation on what you learn about this relationship as a whole.

This package will help you take a realistic look at your life as a human being and to see that you might not be able to grow wings and fly but you can take yourself much higher than you ever thought possible (but not so high that the sun burns the wax on your wings because they’re not real). It will increase your awareness of yourself and allow for more confidence, more acceptance, better relationships with yourself and others, and a commitment to continuous daily action that makes a positive difference to your life instead of keeping you stuck where you don’t wanna be.

Get in touch for that free reality-scoping call if this might be what you’re looking for.

“Within the series of coaching, I gained the trust (or better say re-gained) that I can and will pursue my business goal, which steps I will take, and that no plans are too big.”
-Client Testimonial

Who is this coaching package for?

The Reality Check coaching package is for people who are passionate about life but haven’t yet figured out how to express that passion in a way that works for them.

Maybe you feel confused because you know that you haven’t quiet reached your potential in your professional life or private relationships with others but you know this potential is there; maybe you feel frustrated because you keep trying things that don’t quite work out or ‘fit’ who you are; maybe you feel ‘restless’ because you have something inside of you that hasn’t figured out how to emerge yet (usually your ‘real self’ or a creative project or process that’s attempting to burst out of your chest); maybe you made a lot of progress in the past but life knocked you off course and you’re struggling to get back in the zone.

In short, the Reality Check coaching package is for you if you know the ‘next level’ is there but you’re struggling to reach it.

In all of the cases mentioned above, and others like them, the thing that’s missing is the same: reality. By working together, we can put you back in touch with a strong foundation on which to build or rebuild your life in a way that actually means something to you. This involves taking a good, hard look at yourself, the world, and reality and then agreeing on ACTION that will take you there. Of course, more than just agreeing on that action it means committing to TAKE it.

I won’t pretend that this coaching package is for everybody, because it isn’t. To make the most out of the process you have to be willing not just to learn about yourself but to act on what you learn. Though we may use a ‘modular’ approach to the way that we structure the sessions overall, ultimately, we’ll be asking you difficult questions that may require some difficult or uncomfortable answers.

There’s an old saying (thanks, JC):

“The truth will set you free”

This is true but the non-abridged version goes more like this:

 The truth will set you free but first it will piss you off and make you miserable

If you’re not prepared to work through the short-term discomfort of recognising and then letting go of your cherished untruths about yourself, the world, and reality then this package isn’t for you.  Don’t sign up if you’re expecting to just hear what you wanna hear (“Follow your dreams”, “Unicorns exist”, “Anything is possible if you just put your mind to it and don’t take action”) – this isn’t some silly little thing you’re just doing for ‘personal development’. It’s something you’re doing to grow real and that means being real with yourself (and everybody else). On the other side of that discomfort is freedom – push yourself a little.

If you can’t look at yourself and you can’t take feedback or be held accountable without it bringing up your mummy and daddy issues and making you defensive, then don’t sign up for this coaching; if you wanna handle your problems like an adult, get out of your comfort zone, and not just ‘talk’ about things, then get in touch. If you’re willing to put in everything you’ve got, then I promise you I’ll give you everything I’ve got too and I’ll be there cheering you on at the finish line when you get to where you wanna be.

This package is for you if you’re open-minded, consider yourself to be relatively ‘successful’ but not quite as satisfied as you could be, and may even have tried various interventions like therapy or self-help courses to reach your goals but haven’t had the results that you’d quite like. You probably keep hitting the same walls because of whatever emotional blocks and false assumptions about reality that you have and you’re on the cusp of understanding them but want to knock them down and break through to the other side. Ideally, you’re a creative person who is working to improve the world and you value truth, freedom, and communication.

If this sounds like you, then get in touch and we can arrange a free introductory reality-scoping call to see if we’re a good match for each other:

“Oli’s style is supportive, warm, and inspiring.”
-Client Testimonial

What will we cover with this Reality Check?

The Reality Check coaching package combines ‘traditional’ methods – in the form of the GROW model and other coaching techniques like values elicitation, vision setting, SMART goals, accountability, reflection, etc.-  with the practical and philosophical elements of Personal Revolutions: A Short Course in Realness.

We will use a holistic set of tools and strategies to test your assumptions about yourself, the world, and reality – looking at how you might have room to grow in these areas and stop holding yourself back.

The focus of the Reality Check is to help you gain an understanding of where you really want to go when you take your ego out of the equation, how you’re holding yourself back, and what you need to do to take yourself there.

By the end of the three-and-a-half month process you will have:

  • A more real connection to your basic humanity and the sense of freedom and purpose that comes with it (i.e you’ll beon the Train).
  • An abundance mentality that helps you move through life with less fear of loss.
  • A better understanding of yourself, the world, and reality.
  • An improved inner mindset that allows you to accept yourself and stop caring about unreal things that don’t matter (‘Realness‘).
  • Less anxiety-driven resistance between yourself and life and more time spent living it.
  • A better relationship with the emotional ‘stuff’ that’s holding you back.
  • A more finely-tuned ‘Bullshit Detector’ in relation to the stories you tell yourself and that you let the world tell you.
  • An appreciation for your real values and how to translate them into action.
  • A vision for where you want to be in the future and an understanding of the goals that will take you there.
  • More confidence in yourself because you know who you are and what you want (you’ll get your balls back).
  • Tangible progress towards your life goals.
  • A better understanding of what life is, how things work, and what you want to do with this information.
  • An understanding of your past, real action in your present, and excitement about the future.
  • More genuine private and professional relationships as you come from a place that’s more real.
  • An increased sense of momentum and clear evidence that you’re moving in the direction you want to be moving in.

We will achieve this by having an initial 90 minute ‘jumpstart’ Reality Check to assess where you are and what you’re currently all about. After that, we will work through seven highly personalised and tailor-made modular sessions by using a structured process of exploration and accountability to help you look at your life, set a vision, and break it down into goals that you are committed to working on. Ultimately, we will be building awareness and then translating it into action using the following realities as our compass:

#1: You’re going to be dead one day.

Death – This session will help you dive in at the deep end by reflecting on the fact that your time here is limited and so you better do something real with it. We will look at reframing ‘death’ in such a way that it makes life meaningful and increases your confidence and acceptance. We will also explore your values so that we can start to shift into designing a life that embodies your real values instead of suppressing them behind the ones you picked up externally.

Aim: Setting a value-based vision for yourself and the time that you (probably) have left.

 

#2: Nobody can save you but yourself; it’s all up to you.

Activity – Our second coaching session will build on the first by exploring barriers to activity. We will explore how your biological wiring and social conditioning can be best managed so that you can avoid an attitude of passivity and stagnation. We will re-explore your vision and begin to break it down into SMART goals so that you can start moving forward with your (r)evolution.

Aim: To set a foundation of good habits that will serve as the groundwork for real growth and to set SMART goals that will start moving you forwards.

#3: Everything changes, including ‘you’ and ‘your’ thoughts.

Flux – In this session, we will explore the illusion of stasis, especially in relation to the unrealistic self-image that you carry about yourself which holds you back from reality. We will look at where this image came from and the emotions that allowed it to flourish (shame, guilt, trauma, anger, etc.). Our aim is to start deconstructing this image so that we can replace it with something that’s more real.

Aim: To understand where your image of yourself came from and how any self-limiting beliefs you have about yourself, the world, and reality can be demolished.

#4: There are no events, only processes.

Process – In this session, we will build on the previous three by reframing the way that we look at reality. This will help us to begin exploring the differences between concepts and reality and how thinking in terms of one over the other affects our lives. Ultimately, we will start to explore reality as a series of unifying processes, not separate events. This will allow us to start making the shift towards wholeness over fragmentation.

Aim: To help you understand what processes you need to dedicate yourself to in order to take continuous action and get to where you need to be.

#5: Uncertainty will take you further than certainty.

Uncertainty – In this session, we will further explore the gap between concept and reality by helping to look at your relationship with chaos. We will look at how our point of view of the world is informed by our self-image and our desire to allow it to remain the same. We will also explore how our relationship with uncertainty is related to our emotional relationship with ourselves and the chaos that this relationship can bring to our lives.

Aim: To help you find a solid ‘grounding’ in yourself so that you can ride out uncertainty and keep moving towards your goals with less stress and unnecessary friction.

#6: The only choice you have to make in each moment is between wholeness and fragmentation.

Wholeness – In this session, we review the concept of wholeness (as opposed to fragmentation) and bring together the various threads we have woven so far. We will look at wholeness in yourself, your world, and reality and then explore where you might be moving in the direction of either wholeness or fragmentation overall. We will look at how you can better connect yourself to the world around you by designing a real, value-based purpose.

Aim: To help you find value-based experiences of wholeness that make your life worth living and help you find your ‘real’ self.


#7: Life becomes ‘meaningful’ when we choose a self-directed purpose and dedicate ourselves to it.

Purpose – This final session, will help you gain clarity of purpose. We will look at “making your values valuable to others” and how you can use the information you have acquired about yourself and your values throughout the Reality Check to dedicate yourself to a purpose that will give your life real meaning.

Aim: To bring everything together and to help you understand the direction you’ll be moving in now you have a better understanding of yourself, the world, and reality.

In short, the Reality Check coaching package is a three month (approx.) series of powerful conversations designed to raise your awareness and allow you to translate it into action.

Here’s what you’ll get at a bare minimum:

  • 3.5 months of structured support towards building awareness of yourself, the world, and reality and taking strategic action based on what you learn.
  • An initial 90 minute one-on-one ‘Jump Start’ Reality Check coaching session.
  • 7 one hour sessions using the seven premises above as a springboard into contextualised coaching about your own life.
  • E-book versions of Personal Revolutions: A Short Course in Realness.
  • Email support in between sessions for the duration of the coaching process.
  • ‘Homework’ to keep you on track.
  • Access to 12 MP3 recordings of the Personal Revolutions Podcast covering various areas of realness.

If you commit to the process you’ll also get:

  • A better understanding of the fundamental cause of your problems, practical solutions, and clear momentum towards living your unlived life and making your dreams a reality.

Investment: £1,200

Get in touch now and arrange a quick reality-scoping session to see if we can work together:

Thanks for reading and looking forward to chatting soon!