by Oli Anderson, Transformational Coach for Realness
Synchronicity is Very REAL but Sometimes It’s Just a Projection of Our Unconscious ‘Stuff’ that Needs Integrating
Do you ever feel like the universe, God, life, or [whatever you wanna call higher TRUTH] is guiding you with signs and synchronicities but something still feels…off?
Perhaps on the surface of things, everything looks very much aligned and so the patterns, connections, and meaningful ‘coincidences’ you see and feel start to give you the sense that something bigger is at play.
Despite this, though, there’s still a tension or tightness in your relationship with yourself and life – a sense that you’re trying to force meaning out of things rather than flowing with them.
If you’ve experienced this phenomenon and can’t decide if you’re experiencing a genuine synchronicity or actually going mad then this article is for you because here’s the truth:
Synchronicity is real but it can also be hijacked by the ego.
This is important to know because – if you don’t understand the difference – you can end up stuck in illusion rather than growing into something REAL.
Let’s dig a little deeper:
Synchronicity vs. Projection: What We'll Cover in this Article
- Synchronicity is Very REAL but Sometimes It’s Just a Projection of Our Unconscious ‘Stuff’ that Needs Integrating
- What Is a Synchronicity Anyway?
- A Real-Life Example
- Why Doesn’t It Always Lead Anywhere?
- The Three Levels of Mind: Conscious, Unconscious, & Superconscious
- The Problem: We Block the Flow
- The Void
- How Projection Masquerades as Synchronicity
- Unreal Synchronicity: The Ego’s Version
- A Common Example: Angel Numbers (and Similar Patterns)
- The Key Indicator: Tension vs Flow
- God’s Synchronicity: The “Wink”
- The Trap: Looking for Signs Instead of Living
- The Way Back: The GODWAVE
- Final Thought: Stop Looking, Start Living
What Is a Synchronicity Anyway?
The term synchronicity was coined by Carl Jung, who described it as:
“An acausal connecting principle”.
In simple terms, it’s when your inner world and outer world collide in a way that feels deeply meaningful and way beyond what could reasonably be explained as mere “coincidence”.
One of Jung’s most famous examples involved a patient who was describing a dream about a scarab beetle and, as she spoke, a beetle resembling a scarab tapped against the window behind Jung whereupon he opened the window, caught the insect, and presented it to her.
The timing was uncanny and so something ‘clicked‘ in them both that made them feel they were clearly in the right place at the REAL time.
A Real-Life Example
I actually experienced something very similar myself.
I was coaching a client at my house and we were talking about the importance of real action in the sense of not just thinking or planning, but actually moving.
I used the metaphor of being in a train station vs. being on the actual train:
The basic idea is that you can stand on the platform all day thinking, analysing, and hesitating but at some point, you have to step onto the train so that things can actually move.
(There’s an article about this here: The Train: A Metaphor for the Good Life and Growing Real).
As soon as we said this an Italian moka coffee pot sitting on the hob suddenly started whistling incredibly loudly – just like a steam train about to leave the station.
We both froze and then looked at each other because we just knew that this was a special moment and that it was way more than just “good timing” or a coincidence” – it meant the client was on their REAL path again.
Basically, the moment wasn’t random because it carried meaning and reinforced the exact truth we were pointing at – that’s synchronicity!
You’ve probably had moments like this too?
I’m sharing all of this to be clear about one simple fact:
Synchronicity is a REAL phenomenon and so, even if science doesn’t fully explain it, it happens.
Here’s where things get interesting, though:
Why Doesn’t It Always Lead Anywhere?
If synchronicity is real then why does following it sometimes lead to confusion, stagnation, or even delusion?
Why do some ‘sign’s feel profound and truly meaningful while others just keep you going in circles?
The answer – as far as I can tell is simple, but not always comfortable:
Not everything that feels like synchronicity is synchronicity – sometimes…it’s ‘just’ a projection.
The Three Levels of Mind: Conscious, Unconscious, & Superconscious
To understand this properly, it helps to see the mind in three layers or levels:
1. The Conscious Mind
Your everyday awareness like your thoughts, interpretations, and the decisions you make about things.
2. The Unconscious Mind
Where your unresolved emotional ‘stuff’ lives like shame, fear, trauma, repressed desires and intentions.
3. The Superconscious Mind
Wholeness itself – a.k.a. Truth or the deeper intelligence of life itself.
In an ideal state these three levels are aligned (which most of us will never attain completely – though we’ll all have moments which is when REAL synchronicity is often experience):
- The unconscious becomes conscious (you face your ‘stuff’).
- The superconscious flows through the unconscious (truth integrates your emotional world).
- The conscious mind acts in alignment with reality.
This is what it means to be integrated and to tap into your REALNESS.
The Problem: We Block the Flow
The thing to understand that there is a natural drive towards wholeness that is always unfolding which means that life is constantly trying to bring you back into alignment with your realness.
The problem is that we block it by getting in our own way at two main levels:
1. Mental Blocks
Like unreal beliefs, narratives, and familiar ego structures.
2. Emotional Blocks
Like repressed shame, guilt, and/or trauma that create fragmentation in our inner world and causes us to hold back and hesitate in life.
This fragmentation is always a sign that we’re living the Void instead of reality:
The Void
The short-version of all this is that when you’re disconnected from truth, then you end up living in what we can call the Void.
The Void is experienced as a kind of tension and inner pressure that comes from not being aligned with reality and bringing constant friction into our lives.
When we’re living in the Void, two important things start to happen:
1. You Feel Constant Inner Tension
Something feels ‘off’, even when things look ‘good’ on the surface of things.
2. You Project Your Unconscious Onto the World
As Jung put it:
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it God/fate”.
Or, in the language we’re using in this article:
You’ll call it synchronicity.
How Projection Masquerades as Synchronicity
When you’re in the Void, you’re desperate (often without ‘knowing’ it at a conscious level) to resolve that inner tension.
The only REAL way to resolve this tension is start returning to an alignment with truth by shifting into acceptance over judgement and taking REAL action.
The ego literally CAN’T face the truth because “the ego is the opposite of reality” and so – instead – it looks for something in the external world to fix it.
This external thing will probably be a ‘good’ thing like a person, a path, an opportunity, or [whatever] else but the ego distorts it into being elevated as an ULTIMATE THING (instead of just a ‘good one).
This is because the ego believes something along the lines of “If I get this… I’ll finally feel whole” – not realising that only truth – your REAL relationship with life itself – can restore wholeness (i.e. life is the only ULTIMATE and the other ‘stuff’ is just gravy at the very best).
In relation to synchronicity, the ego will start looking for ‘signs’ in the world that whatever this supposed ‘ultimate’ thing is is coming our way and this is what starts causing problems:
Unreal Synchronicity: The Ego’s Version
When synchronicity is hijacked by the ego like this it feels INTENSE, charged, and almost addictive.
Essentially, there’s a longing behind it – a kind of existential ACHE which means that we end up chasing signs because we NEED them (to release the tension of being in the Void) and not because they’re a reflection of how we’re just walking our own real path.
A Simple Example: The Crush Illusion
Think about someone with a crush:
When somebody’s deep in a crush but haven’t expressed this to the person they’re crushing on (because of a fear of rejection etc.) then every little thing the other person does gets interpreted as a ‘sign’ that they feel the same way.
Fore example:
- They smiled → “They must like me”.
- They texted → “It’s meant to be”.
- They looked over → “There’s something here for sure”.
This doesn’t mean the crush is REAL, though – it’s just a reminder that PERCEPTION IS PROJECTION (in many cases) and so what they’re seeing is just a projection of their own DESIRE.
(They could actually be right but until they talk to their crush it’s just a projection – we do the same with life when we go looking for signs because of that inner tension of the Void).
A Common Example: Angel Numbers (and Similar Patterns)
A perfect modern example of this kinda thing going on is “angel numbers”:
What normally happens is that people see repeating numbers like 11, 22, 33, etc. and interpret them as messages from some divine force.
This doesn’t mean that the divine can’t speak to us (I’m certainly not the person to say one way or the other) but the FACT is that you can see multiple repeating number patterns on a clock every single hour and so often the only reason they stand out is because you’re looking for them (because you told your unconscious mind to look for signs to remove that tension of the Void).
More evidence of this is the fact that:
Most people don’t actually change anything after seeing them.
They just get a small hit of relief, a temporary easing of the Void, and then carry on with business as usual (usually being unreal if they’re stuck in this cycle).
This isn’t growth but resistance to reality.
The Key Indicator: Tension vs Flow
So all of this begs an obvious question:
How do you tell the difference between real synchronicity and projection?
The answer is that it all comes down to one thing:
Inner Tension.
We can break it down a bit like this:
Unreal Synchronicity (Projection)
- Feels urgent.
- Feels addictive.
- Has an emotional charge (longing, craving, desperation).
- Keeps you stuck or looping.
- Comes from seeking signs instead of receiving them.
Real Synchronicity (Alignment)
- Feels calm.
- Feels natural.
- Reinforces something you’re already doing.
- Moves you forward.
- Comes when you’re not looking for it or chasing things.
Real synchronicity doesn’t pull you out of yourself – it meets you in your REALNESS and the REAL ACTION you take as an expression of it.
God’s Synchronicity: The “Wink”
When you’re aligned which means that you’re grounded, present, and taking real action then synchronicity shows up in a way that’s subtle, almost playful, and like a ‘wink’ from life itself.
This wink doesn’t tell you what to do – it simply confirms that what you’re already doing is REAL (like with my coaching client and the coffee pot, for example).
That’s the difference.
The Trap: Looking for Signs Instead of Living
The main place where people get lost is that they start chasing synchronicity instead of living in a REAL way.
In other words, the synchronicity and the quest to receive more of it becomes another ‘ultimate’ that’s supposed to fill the Void.
This just leads to looking for signs instead of taking action, interpreting everything in the same old ways (ego) instead of integrating anything and learning from it, and staying in their heads instead of engaging with life
In doing so, they drift further from realness and cause more friction, frustration, and misery in their lives.
If you want to go deeper into all this then check out the synchronicity ‘stuff’ in my book Trust: A Manual in Becoming the Void, Building Flow, and Finding Peace.
The Way Back: The GODWAVE
If you want to step out of projection and into real synchronicity, you need to stop chasing signs and start building alignment:
This means putting yourself into what we can call the GODWAVE which is just a state of deep flow where all levels of your being are working together.
Here’s some practical tips for starting to move in this direction:
Step 1: Regulate Your Nervous System
If your body is in a constant stress response (sympathetic dominance), then everything will feel urgent and distorted and you’ll eventually get burned out.
This is why it’s always good to take a policy of REGULATION FIRST so that the actions you take aren’t unreal and reinforcing ego.
Simple practices that can help are things like:
- Nose breathing (inhales and exhales)
- Walking in nature
- Reducing overstimulation
Regulation creates space and space allows truth to emerge (which is what real change is all about).
Step 2: Integrate Your Emotions
Your unconscious ‘stuff’ doesn’t disappear because you ignore it – it gets stored in your emotional reservoir and then gets projected out into the world.
The way forward is to learn to:
- Notice emotional reactions.
- Sit with discomfort without escaping.
- Be honest about what you’re resisting and shift into acceptance.
Integration turns projection into awareness so you can grow from it.
Step 3: Take Real Action
This is where everything ‘clicks’ into place because the truth is that you don’t think your way into alignment and flow – you act your way into it.
Start looking at how you can take more REAL ACTION in your life:
- What’s one real step I can take today?
- What am I avoiding that I know is true?
Then do it without overthinking or waiting for a sign – the more you move, the more the next steps will become clear.
Final Thought: Stop Looking, Start Living
You don’t need more ‘signs’ – you need more alignment with your own REALNESS.
You don’t need confirmation from the universe (or whatever) – you need connection to reality because when you’re truly in it – grounded, integrated, moving forward – life will meet you.
You won’t have to question it because there won’t be any tension – just real FLOW.
If you take anything from this, let it be this:
Don’t ask whether something is a sign – ask whether you’re aligned because when you are, you won’t need to look for synchronicity. It will find you.
Stay real out there,
P.S. If you’re ready to put yourself in the flow and to overcome the mental and emotional blocks in yourself then book a free coaching session with me and I’ll help you take real action.
Trust: A Manual for Becoming the Void, Building Flow, and Finding Peace is a book about learning to return to your realness by cultivating trust in yourself and trust in life.
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