by Oli Anderson, Transformational Coach for Realness
People screw up their lives because they think that ‘reality’ is an obstacle to whatver they want.
The TRUTH is that reality is never ever an obstacle, barrier, or blockage because to get what you WANT – which is always peace of mind or ACCEPTANCE in some form or another – you always always always need REALITY to get it.
A lot of people think that being ‘realistic’ is DEPRESSING because it means facing all of the uncomfortable and BRUTAL truths about life – for example:
-We’re all gonna be dead one day
-Things don’t always work out
-‘Bad’ things happen to ‘good’ people etc.
That’s because there’s a difference between being ‘realistic’ and being REAL:
Being ‘realistic’ means observing the inevitabilities in life and accepting them as the end of the line.
Being REAL means observing the inevitabilities in life and accepting them as a SPRINGBOARD into new beginnings and the next version of whoever it is that you ARE.
In other words, when we get caught up in being ‘realistic’ we see the obstacles and limits of reality as BARRIERS to our growth; when we’re being REAL we see them as VESSELS for our growth.
Being ‘realistic’ is about treating your INTERPRETATIONS of life as the limits of your life… Being REAL is about understanding that all of these limits are just a tool for sharpening the sword of your TRUTH upon so you can go more deeply into life.
If you treat reality as being an OBSTACLE then that’s all you’ll ever get.
What you need to do is make a shift into ACCEPTING reality (and yourself) no matter what so that you can keep leaning in, keep pushing through, and keep growing REAL.
If you do that then one of two things will happen whenever you come up against an ‘obstacle’:
1. You’ll either find a way to CHANGE the situation by taking ACTION of some kind.
2. You’ll realise that you’re facing something taht actually can’t be changed and so you will become more ACCEPTING.
In both cases you will GROW MORE REAL (i.e. whole).
Reality is never a barrier to your ‘happiness’ – it’s always the FOUNDATION on which your happiness can be built.
The only actual obstacle to happiness is the RELATIONSHIP you have with yourself and your RESISTANCE to truth.
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Trust: A Manual for Becoming the Void, Building Flow, and Finding Peace is a book about learning to return to your realness by cultivating trust in yourself and trust in life.
It contains practical exercises and dedicated meditations (Transformational Bridges) to take you DEEP in knowing yourself and life.
This book will answer many of the questions you have growing REAL and flowing towards wholeness. It covers everything from shame to addiction to the unconscious mind and synchronicity (and way more).
Personal Revolutions: A Short Course in Realness is a book designed to help you look at your life from the inside-out so that you can stop holding yourself back and go get what you really want.
It contains 166 practical ‘Revolutions’ for awareness and over 8,000 Self-Guidance Questions for you to uncover new insight about yourself, the world, and reality that you can translate into action and start building your real life on the realest possible foundation.
Shadow Life is an exploration of the human shadow and the hidden side of our personalities. It looks at the masks we wear, where these masks come from, and how we can take them off.
The book explores how we can better manage our relationships with shame, guilt, and trauma in order to remove the Mask that the world has asked us to wear (and that we forgot we were wearing) so we can live an authentic life with less drama, chaos, or BS whilst we’re still around.
The Flow Builder Journal has everything you need to make the next 21-weeks of your life a turning point.
It has monthly, weekly, and daily (morning and evening) check-ins, tools and reflections to keep you in the zone and keep you flowing with zest and momentum.
If you want to get unstuck and grow REAL then check it out.
Download EGO/SHADOW/TRUST - a free guide to transformation that will walk you through the vital stages of Awareness, Acceptance, and Action with practical strategies to implement right away.
Join the 7-Day Bare Ass Minimum (BAM) Challenge and start to implement foundational health habits and a powerful life vision only a week from now.
