power

‘Why Do People Play Mind Games?’ – The Truth About POWER, SCARCITY, and EGO

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Intro: What Does It Mean To Play Mind Games?

This article is about the UNREAL mind games that people play, why they play them in the first place, and what you can do if you find yourself involved with somebody who’s trying to pull you into this kind of mental bullshittery.

Before you read the main bulk of the article you need to know that these games are simply a form of DRAMA and that all drama is simply an unreal attempt of one person – or parties if you look at it culturally – to drag another person into the narratives and ideas that their EGO depends on for existence.

If you’re a rational adult human being and you find yourself engaging with somebody that plays ‘mind games’ with you then you need to realise that the only REAL way to ‘win’ is to simply walk away (or as I’ve said a million and three times on this website and elsewhere: “Gimme something real or GTFO”).

Mind games always stem from somebody being INSECURE about their position in life and the way that they see themselves because of a PERCEIVED lack of power or status (because they’re insecure and they’re comparing themselves to others based on ILLUSORY standards and ideals that exist in their MINDS alone – hence these games being called ‘Mind’ Games).

If you engage with the ‘game’ then it just means that you’re being insecure at some level too and you probably have some work to do in terms of RESPECTING yourself and setting the real, healthy boundaries that having such self-respect entails.

A general ‘rule’ of life is that you get what you tolerate and so if you put up with these kind of mind games or even find yourself playing back then you’re just inviting more unnecessary drama and more BS into your life.

This is always a distraction from the fact that you’ve lost touch with your own PURPOSE at some level and so you find solace in engaging in the pettiness and prickliness that comes from mind games.

This article will help you understand why people play these games in the first place, some of the most common and basic games that get played, and what you can do to WORK ON YOURSELF and disengage from this kind of nonsense whilst keeping your sanity intact and growing REAL.

Here we go:

What Type Of Person Plays Mind Games? – Ego, Scarcity, And Control

The first thing you need to know about mind games is that – like DRAMA – they are played by people who are insecure and have an emotional need to CONTROL things in order to keep their insecurity at bay.

In other words, playing MIND GAMES is a form of CONTROL FREAKERY which means that it’s an attempt by somebody to control their external surroundings – and the people in it – in such a way that it allows them to keep their self-image in place and to keep unwanted emotional ‘stuff’ at bay.

If you haven’t read much of my writing before then you might need to know here that when people are being unreal in this way their SELF-IMAGE/EGO is actually an UNREAL construct that has been created by the person in question (unconsciously and consciously) to help them hide certain underlying emotions from themselves.

Almost always, these emotions are ‘negative’ – like shame, guilt, and/or trauma – but it’s also possible that they’re trying to hide positive emotions from themselves because these emotions have caused them to get in trouble in the past.

An example here is that maybe they had a situation somewhere in their history where they freely expressed their ‘joy’ or ‘love’ but this just ended up getting them HURT and so now they disowned these positive feelings behind a self-image that helps them convince themselves they don’t have these feelings anymore (so they won’t get hurt again).

Whatever the case may be, ‘Game Players’ are using the games that they play in an attempt to manipulate people into acting in such a way that they can tell themselves the STORY THEY WANT TO BELIEVE ABOUT THEMESELVES IS TRUE (when it isn’t – because if it was they wouldn’t be playing games as THE TRUTH SPEAKS FOR ITSELF).

They WANT TO BELIEVE this story not because it’s true but because it allows them to keep hiding from themselves and not have to do the difficult work of facing or re-integrating their emotional ‘stuff’ (and the point should probably be made that what we ‘want’ doesn’t have any impact on the truth at all).

In short, then, the type of person who plays mind games is almost always an INSECURE CONTROL FREAK (though they might not and probably don’t identify as that).

Along with control freakery, there are also a few other characteristic emotional and thought patterns that game players also embody:

The first is that they almost always have a SCARCITY MINDSET and see life as a zero-sum game.

That might sound a bit ‘technical’ but all it means is that they see the REAL and IMPORTANT things in life (like ‘acceptance’, ‘truth’,  ‘feeling good’, etc.) as being SCARCE instead of ABUNDANT (which the real things are because reality applies to EVERYBODY) and so they believe that if somebody else feels good then it somehow means they won’t be able to (that’s the Zero-sum game part: if I have X then you can’t have X whereas in reality it’s possible for us to both have X at the same time (A Non-Zero Sum Game)).

Because of their underlying insecurity, seeing life in this way just causes them to constantly be comparing themselves to others and to assess themselves according to BULLSHIT STANDARDS that they’ve created for themselves about what it ‘means’ to be ‘winning’ in the context of the game (which they also made up).

This feeds back into their control freakery and so not only do they attempt to play games to control situations and to mask their insecurity from themselves and others but also at this extra level of being able to convince themselves that they’re ‘winning’ some illusory competition that only exists in their heads because of their INABILITY to face and perceive REALITY accurately.

In short, then, these GAME PLAYERS are ultimately detached from their real selves, created a FAKE IMAGE of themselves to try and act out as a response to this, and then end up trying to use games as a way of controlling the world around them in order to keep hiding and to convince themselves that their FALSE PERCEPTION of reality is the truth about things.

How To Tell If Someone Is Playing Mind Games With You: Mental Tension, Anxiety, and Addiction to Dramatic Situations

To understand if somebody is actually playing mind games with you, it’s essential that you understand one of the ‘simplest’ and most common mind games known to humanity (in fact, this is probably the most common mind game on the planet and you’ve probably been dragged into it at some stage in your life).

This game is known as THE CHASE (or, at least, that’s what I’m calling it) and it exists because of a simple law of human psychology that pervades all of our minds when we’re running on instinctual autopilot and letting our EGOs operate for us instead of being real.

This law of human nature is one you’ll have heard in some way, shape, or form before probably:

People want what they can’t have and don’t want what they can have.

Again, this comes back to something that was mentioned above: a SCARCITY MINDSET.

When we PERCEIVE things as being ‘scarce’ – whether they actually are in reality or not (hence it being about ‘perception’) – then our human instinct is to treat them as being VALUABLE.

If we perceive something as being abundant or something that absolutely anybody can ‘have’ then our tendency is to think that it’s not valuable and to no longer want it.

This is just a weird ‘bug’ in human psychology but it’s something that we all instinctively ‘know’ and are driven by – if we live on instinctual autopilot – and is why Game Players use this quirk of human nature as the foundation of the majority of the games they play.

The Chase – i.e. making ourselves seem more ‘scarce’ than we actually are in order to control situations – is something that you will see playing out time and time again in many different areas of life:

-In the world of dating, you might run into a game player who purposely ignores your texts or makes themselves otherwise unavailable.

-In the world of business, you might bump into a marketer that will tell you they only have a limited number of their products/services available.

-In your social circle, somebody might attempt to give themselves the PERCEPTION of higher status by making themselves hard to get hold of or making their time more scarce than it actually is.

-Etc.

I’m sure you can think of examples in your own life.

Of course, not everybody that’s unavailable is playing a game – maybe they’re just busy or they actually have a life. With GAME PLAYERS, however, they are purposely manipulating situations so that you will think they’re more ‘valuable’ than they actually are.

If you’re not aware of this then you’ll end up doing exactly what the game is designed to make you do: CHASE THEM.

This is the easiest way to know if you’ve been dragged into a mind game (and happen to be ‘losing’):

-You constantly find yourself ‘chasing’ another person.

-You constantly feel anxiety or mental TENSION because you’re always on the ‘lookout’ for signs that they’re going to give you valuable attention (or whatever).

-You don’t feel like the relationship is ‘balanced’ in terms of the respect you’re giving each other but for some reason you can’t stop yourself from engaging in this UNREAL way.

-Etc.

Another common trick that GAME PLAYERS play is that they will initially bombard you with the kind of attention you want (which they’re normally good at figuring out on a person-to-person basis because they’re master manipulators).

For example, they might – at the start of a relationship – spend all night texting you or whatever and making you feel like they understand you (assuming that’s what they think you want and what you respond well to).

Once they’ve got you ‘hooked’ then they’ll withdraw this attention and then try to get you sucked into the CHASE.  This is how they increase the odds of getting you to play the game – they get you addicted (because of your own insecurity, tbh) then they play with that in order to enjoy the thrill of the chase.

Ultimately, like all mind games – the ‘thrill’ that Game Players get from playing with you in this way is that they feel POWERFUL.

This ‘powerful’ feeling comes from the perception that the person doing the chasing is less valuable than the person being chased (because of the law of human nature shared above that we want what we can’t have and that we don’t want what we can have).

This is a very ‘animalistic’ thing and ultimately comes down to the way that human beings have a natural tendency to assess social situations in relation to POWER.

All of the games that people play are ultimately about attempting to see oneself – for the sake of one’s EGO ‘stuff’ – as the most ‘powerful’ one in a given dynamic.

Here are some other simple games that are commonly played that evolve around the same BS way of thinking:

Common Games That People Play (To Increase  Self-Perception in Terms of ‘Power’).

Most mind games are some sort of variation of ‘The Chase’ and all have the idea of ‘power’ over another person at their heart.

Some of the most common games that people play on a daily basis and that you can get sucked into if you’re not careful are:

“Yeah, but” – This is a game named by the Transactional Analyst Eric Berne and basically involves the Game Player asking you for some advice about a ‘problem’ that they have in life only for them to shut down every suggestion you make with “Yeah, but (and then an excuse for not doing it)”.

The ‘game’ here is that – if you’re not careful – you will end up trying to ‘chase’ them by coming up with more and more suggestions as to how they can solve their problems.

Because they have no desire whatsoever to solve the problem – which might not even exist in the first place – or to let you know that the advice you’re giving is ‘good’ enough or effective they’ll just keep deflecting anything you suggest.

An insecure person will keep playing the game which just allows the game player to feel ‘powerful’ or ‘superior’ (really a mask for their own insecurity).  If you’re secure (i.e. REAL with yourself) then you’ll snap out of it and just let them get on with it by themselves.

Talking over you/ Not listening – This is a game that some insecure Game Players will play in a group of people.  Because they have convinced themselves that the person who talks the most is the most powerful or important then they will  make a conscious effort to speak over anybody else who talks in the group.

In their minds, they tell themselves that this must mean they’re the most important or powerful because they’re doing the most talking (even if they’re chatting nonsense!). Again, they’ve fallen into the Zero-sum trap (mentioned above) and have convinced themselves that attention is ‘scarce’ and so they need to try and ‘take’ it from others using these kind of games.

If you’re not careful/real, then you can get caught up in this game and either end up being subdued and hiding in yourself or even turning up the volume yourself and talking over others. Both of these approaches are actually unreal and mean that the game BEAT YOU –  the best thing to do is simply to not play by only talking when you actually want to talk or WALKING AWAY if the game becomes too insane.

Ignoring – Another game that is obviously related to the chase is that Game Players will ignore you on purpose (in social situations, texts, whatever) hoping that they will lure you into a CHASE for their attention.

Again – as a reminder – people who play these kind of games are only doing it because they’re INSECURE but if you’re not careful you can take it as a ‘personal’ thing and end up getting caught up in the chase or even questioning them about why they ignored you in the first place.

If somebody does ignore you for whatever reason then you need to remember that it says more about THEM than you.  As soon as it starts to ‘bother’ you, then you’ve lost the game.

Teasing – Sometimes, people will ‘tease’ you to see if they can get a rise out of you or to make you lose control of yourself emotionally.

Of course, some ‘teasing’ is done in good spirits and is just ‘banter’ between friends (so there’s nothing ‘wrong’ with it).

On other occasions, this kind of unreal teasing is just a GAME that people are playing in an attempt to see if you’ll lose your cool, take it personally, or try and defend yourself in some way.

In all of these cases, the GAME is about making you lose control of yourself and to see if you will DOUBT your own self-image (which if you’re insecure and unreal you will).

When you do give the Game Player a sign that you’ve been shaken or bothered by the ‘teasing’ then they feel that you’ve lost control because of them and so – by extension – they have some kind of POWER over you (because you lost it over yourself).

Etc. – These are just simple examples of the common mind games that people will play with you and there are many other variations but they all have the same thing in common: they’re about somebody wanting to feel POWERFUL and in CONTROL of somebody in order to mask their own insecurity and feel like they’re ‘winning’ the game.

The Perception of Power: The Source of All Game Playing

The short answer to ‘WHY’ people want to play games with you in the first place is because they’re insecure (i.e. they have underlying shame, guilt, and/or trauma) and so they attempt to pacify these feelings of insecurity by doing things that make them PERCEIVE themselves as powerful (and perception is not reality).

This means that they become skilled in looking for other people that may be insecure and luring them into the dance of the CHASE in order to feel that they have power over people (and if they have ‘power’ then they can’t be as weak or insecure as they sometimes feel – at least that’s what they tell themselves).

Really, this just boils down to human beings being ANIMALS and animals being wired – in many cases – to think of life in terms of DOMINANCE and SUBMISSION.

If somebody lures you into their game and you give into it then, ultimately, they have dominance over you (because they’re controlling your relationship with REALITY and the actions you take in it) and you have become SUBMISSIVE to their will.

In short, that’s what all of these ‘mind games’ are actually about: testing you to see if you can be made submissive for whatever reason and give up your own REAL relationship with REALITY for somebody’s unreal relationship with BULLSHIT.

If you can, then they’ve beaten you in the ‘game’ and have used you as a vehicle for flipping the script on their own self-perceived submissiveness and allowing themselves to feel DOMINANT.

Whether you like it or not, that’s what mind games are always about – attempting to increase one’s sense of POWER within the social hierarchy and masking the shame (etc.) that comes from being unreal.

How To Outsmart Someone Who Plays Mind Games: Abundance Mindset and Walking Away

The short answer in terms of finding a solution to the problem of mind games is that you need to develop an ABUNDANCE mindset.

This is because and abundance mindset is ALIGNED with reality itself (which is whole and therefore abundant) and so it circumvents all of the unreal programming that causes you to get caught up in the GAMES that come from having a scarcity mindset in the first place.

When you have an abundance mindset, for example, you know that whatever you think you ‘want’ from other people isn’t SCARCE and so you will be less likely to get caught up in the CHASE.

You will also understand that ‘power’ isn’t a Zero-sum game (like the Game Player thinks) and so you won’t have to waste your time getting caught up in the false duality of dominance and submission that the POWER GAMES ultimately rest upon.

The only REAL power that any of us have in life is abundant because it comes from cultivating a REAL relationship with ourselves, the world, and reality.

The long-and-short of all this is that you would only get caught up in UNREAL GAMES if you’re being unreal with yourself at some level.

An abundance mindset allows you to start telling yourself a story about yourself and your life that is more aligned with REALITY and so you will be less likely to either play unreal games with insecure game players or you will not let the effects of the games bother you because you know that the PRIZE IS ALWAYS WORTHLESS (because it’s not real – just a false perception of power).

This brings us to the final point which is  that the easiest way to OUTSMART and ‘win’ when somebody is playing mind games is simply not to play.

If somebody is trying to lure you into a ‘chase’ or is playing any of the variations that we’ve talked about in this article then the best approach is simply to NOT GET INVOLVED.

The more REAL you are in yourself – because you’ve worked on your own emotional ‘stuff’ and you’ve raised your AWARENESS of why these kind of unreal situations emerge in our lives – the easier it will be to walk away.

This,  again, comes down to having an abundance mindset – if you’re  being UNREAL with yourself for whatever reason then you might end up putting your own personal GAME PLAYER on a pedestal and thinking that they’re more scarce than they actually are.

Actually, that’s just a sign that you’ve been dragged into some kind of game and that you’ve put them on an unreal pedestal because of  your own unreal ‘stuff’.

When you’re being real you realise that you DESERVE real in return and so you don’t need to WASTE TIME on somebody that would play games with you.

Realise that there a billions of people out there in the world and that somebody, somewhere will want to be in your life – either as friends, romantically, or otherwise – without playing games.

You can only realise that and walk away to let it happen if you have an abundance mindset.

Remember that “REAL ALWAYS WORKS” and go find the real stuff – life is too short for MIND GAMES and the only ‘thing’ allowing games in your life is you.

Stop playing and start living.

Peace,

If this story inspired or helped you then please share it with others! 🙂

The Black Rose: “Gimme Something Real or GTFO”

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Intro

The easiest way to build a real life for yourself is to learn to spot the difference between real and unreal in ourselves and others (so we can change, ignore or walk away from the unreal stuff).

In this context, ‘real’ means that you’re moving towards WHOLENESS via your true potential, you’re not blocking yourself with negative or irrational thoughts that distort your view of yourself, the world, and reality, and you’re not engaging in DRAMA or unhealthy ego dances with people that don’t support you and your growth (and who you don’t support in return).

Ultimately, this boils down to two incredibly important things:

  1. Having the best possible relationship with yourself.
  2. Having the best possible relationship with others

Really, these two things feed off each other because if you don’t work to ACCEPT yourself then you’ll never be able to provide the most amount of value you can to the world and have the best possible relationships with the people in it.

Because relationships are so important to living a ‘good’ (REAL) life, we need to be able to understand which relationships are worth keeping, which are worth ditching, and which are worth healing if need be.

This article gives you a simple but effective metaphor for just that.

Here we go:

Tending To Your Garden

In the metaphor that we’re going to run with, your life is a garden; you are the gardener and your job is to ensure that you take responsibility for making sure that your ‘garden’ is more populated with flowers (roses in this example, but you can use whatever you want) more than weeds.

This means that you need to realise that you have POWER over the garden and that if you take RESPONSIBILITY and make REAL CHOICES then this garden will be one that you actually want to spend time in.

If you don’t acknowledge your POWER, refuse to take RESPONSIBILITY and become passive and just let things happen or let nature take its course, then your garden will become overrun with WEEDS and it won’t be the kind of place you actually enjoy being in.

Roses or Weeds? That’s the basic choice for all of us but we have to step up and actually MAKE THE CHOICE otherwise we just end up living a life surrounded by unreal relationships and all of the DRAMA and BS that comes with them as everybody tries to uphold their own ego ‘stuff’ and act like an emotional retard (that’s what ‘weeds’ do).

In short then, the quality of your life will be affected by the quality of the relationships you CHOOSE to cultivate and nurture – first, the relationship with YOURSELF and then:

ROSES – the REAL relationships that add mutual VALUE to the lives of the parties involved.

WEEDS – the UNREAL relationships that don’t add mutual value and bring drama and unnecessary conflict.

Gimme Something Real or GTFO

Sometimes, we don’t realise how much power we have over our own ‘gardens’ and our ability to change the scenery.

All this means in practical terms is that it’s up to us who we ALLOW into our lives or not and that we’re more than capable of setting boundaries by saying “NO” to the unreal relationships and people that hold us back.

This might sounds strange if you’re emotionally attached to certain unhealthy ‘weeds’ that aren’t serving you but – actually, as an ADULT human being – you can kick absolutely anybody out of your life for whatever reason you want (that isn’t a recommendation that you should but just a reminder that it’s your CHOICE and you can do what you want without having to JUSTIFY yourself).

Here’s a list of ‘weeds’ that you can start to remove from your garden anytime you like:

-Fake friends that only seem to take from you and never give anything in return.

-People who don’t share your values or moral code and act in shady ways that go against your integrity.

-Family members that keep trying to fit you in a box or cause drama because of their own ego ‘stuff’.

-People you’ve outgrown for whatever reason and that are holding you back.

-Irrational people or emotional retards that are constantly causing trouble or problems for you.

-People that have stabbed you in the back too many times.

-Basically: anybody that you feel doesn’t BELONG in your garden (based on your true values, intentions, and moral code).

Get the trimmers out and say goodbye to those weeds.*

*This is an amazing thing and very empowering but it also means that if you act like a Weed people can trim YOU from their garden.

This doesn’t mean that you should get rid of anybody or everybody that annoys you – if you do that then it’s probably just your ego driving you and you’ll end up LONELY.

In the cases where people are clearly a drain on your time, energy, and attention, though – i.e. acting like bonafide WEEDS – then don’t be shy to step up and set a VALUE on your life that it actually deserves.

*Snip*.

A simple – and very effective – rule of thumb to keep in mind here is as follows:

“GIMME SOMETHING REAL OR GTFO”

Make this one of your official standards for living your life and ensuring that the people you CHOOSE to keep around are bringing the REAL stuff (in exchange for you giving them the real stuff too).

How To Spot A Rose:

If you spot a Rose in your garden then you need to do the work of nurturing the relationship and keeping it there.

This means giving something real in return (quality time, energy, and attention), appreciating its value, and ensuring that you keep it away from weeds that might be trying to KILL the relationship.

Here’s how you can spot a ‘Rose’:

They bring joy to your life

A rose will bring a sense of joy to your life by allowing you to see life CLEARY and to be your REAL SELF.

Energy

This joy will bring energy to your life and make you feel more alive on account of the relationship being LIFE-ENHANCING.

Laughter

Laughter often comes from a sense of shared TRUTH and that’s exactly what the REAL relationships are built on.

They support your goals and your purpose

The roses in your ‘garden’ actually want you to reach your goals and to move towards your life purpose because they have an ABUNDANCE mind set and your success is their success.

They help you learn and grow

The roses also realise that you won’t stay the same forever and that as life moves and those reality waves sweep over you then you’ll learn and grow into the next evolution of your realness (i.e. you’ll go more deeply into WHOLENESS – connection to yourself, the world, and reality).

In contrast, life is a little different when you let the weeds take over:

How To Spot A Weed:

They constantly make you miserable

There’s hardly and joy in your life when the weeds are involved because they’re unreal. This unreality brings FRICTION in the form of drama, frustration, and eventual MISERY.

They DRAIN your energy

The unreal nature of this misery-inducing activity will eventually drain you of energy and you’ll constantly feel depleted and lethargic around them (that’s what happens when you ALLOW the weeds to wrap themselves around you and to restrict your breathing).

There’s hardly ever any laughter

All this misery and untruth is hardly then environment for laughter (but there’ll be plenty of arguments and dramatic moments).

They belittle your goals and try to derail your purpose

The weeds want you to feel bad about yourself because they feel bad about themselves too. “Misery loves company”, after all, and so the weeds don’t want you to take action that might fill your life with more roses.

They don’t want you to learn or grow (usually so they can CONTROL you in some way and keep you the same).

Furthermore, a weed will constantly try and convince you not to grow or to do new things. This is because they don’t want you to OUTGROW them because if you do they might not have a hold on you anymore – it’s about CONTROL (so they’ll often use SHAME to try and stop you growing and GUILT to stop you doing things that are real to you as a way to convince you to stay the ‘same’).

Perhaps by reading that you’ll have already been able to see that some of the people in your life are ‘Roses’ and others are ‘Weeds’.

What you do with that information is up to you, of course, but in general you need to nurture the relationships with the roses and use them so that everybody can grow more real and you need to get rid of the weeds in whatever way works for you.

There is an exception to the rule, though:

Enter the BLACK ROSE

Sometimes, you’ll meet people in your  ‘garden’ that are hard to categorise as either a Weed or a Rose. Sometimes, they appear to be a friend; sometimes, they appear to be a foe. In this case, what you have is a Black Rose.

The Black Rose appears when you’ve taken a passive approach to letting people in your life but don’t get close enough to figure out if they have the potential to be a Rose that can add value to your life or if they’re just a Weed in disguise waiting to complicate things.

In this case, things could go either way – it’s up to you to take an active role towards making the relationship work for you (or stepping back if there are clear signs that the Black Rose will reveal it’s true nature as a Weed).

There are three main ways to handle a Black Rose appearing in your garden:

How to handle the Black Rose:

Figure out if their  ‘good’ side is real or not.

Sometimes, the Black Rose will look like a nice addition to your garden but the closer you look the more you realise that appearances can be deceptive.

Maybe, for example, they will constantly let you down by saying one thing but doing another. This mismatch between words and actions is suggestive that they are being untrue in some way.

Another sign might be that they constantly gossip or say negative things about the other Roses in your garden. This is a sign that they’re just a WEED in disguise trying to destroy things from the inside out.

Obviously, you should probably try and give people the benefit of the doubt but if the Black Rose gives too many signs that the ‘good’ is just a mask for weed-like behaviour then you should be wary (and be prepared to get the pruners out when things get more intense).

Figure out if their ‘bad’ side is real or not.

Sometimes, the Black Rose might just look ‘bad’ on the surface of things because they’re moody or have a strange sense of humour or whatever. It’s possible that this is just because they’re going through some ‘stuff’ and so you might be able to tend to it and turn it into a real relationship.

This depends on how much energy you’re willing to invest overall but it’s a good way to add more roses to your garden if you give the right people the benefit of the doubt.

Figure out if they’re ‘neutral’ or not.

Sometimes, a Black Rose is actually just ‘neutral’ and the best thing to do with it – if they’re not bothering you – is to just leave them in a corner of the garden where they’re just getting on with their own thing.

This applies to people that are ambivalent towards you and that you’re ambivalent towards (basically acquaintances on the periphery of your social network) – if you see them, you can say “hello” or whatever but you don’t have a particularly meaningful relationship with them and neither or you are really interested in one (for no particular reason – just how life is sometimes).

Conclusion

Your life is in your hands but you need to know that you have a responsibility to nurture the ‘garden’ and see things clearly.

You can do this by remembering “Gimme something real or GTFO” and making sure that you’re doing the best you can to cultivate the real relationships and let the unreal ones fall by the wayside.

 


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