by Oli Anderson, Transformational Coach for Realness
Things Come and Things Go…That’s Just Life and its Tides (It’s Not ‘Personal’)
Abundance is often misunderstood.
We tend to think of it as something we possess – a ‘full’ bank account (though there’s always another number so this shows that ‘full’ is impossible), an overflowing table, a life free from struggle, fear, and doubt.
Here’s the reality, though:
True abundance isn’t about what we have in our hands at any given moment; it’s about the ongoing flow of things moving in and out of our lives – just like the tides.
As almost always, nature is our best teacher when it comes to this – look at the ocean, for example:
The tide goes out, but it always comes back in – it’s a rhythm, a cycle, a movement that never truly stops – unless we block it with some kind of ‘unnatural’ intervention (like a dam or something).
The same is true for abundance:
When we fight the natural rhythms of life – when we cling too tightly to what we have or become impatient about what we lack – we disrupt the flow because we use mental concepts and unreal beliefs as a kind of ‘dam’ that stops things flowing. Instead of trusting in the tide by being REAL, we try to control it because of EGO and that’s when we start to feel scarcity, fear, and frustration.
To live in true abundance, we need to stop resisting and start flowing.
Let’s dig a little deeper:
Why Abundance Feels Like It Disappears
It’s a law of nature that everything moves:
Seasons change, fruit ripens, falls and then decays; the tide ebbs and flows. Nothing is ever truly static -except in our minds and interpretations about ourselves, the world, and reality.
The ego craves certainty and permanence – it wants things to stay put so that we can feel ‘safe’ within our own identity (which really is most often just a fragmented version of who we are because it keeps the Shadow Self at bay).
It tells us things like:
- “I finally have ‘enough’ – what if I lose it?”
- “Why isn’t what I want here yet? I must be doing something wrong”.
- “I need to control this situation/event/thing/person so I don’t get hurt“.
But REAL life doesn’t work like that – the moment we cling to what we have or panic about what we don’t have, we shift from flowing with life to fighting against it; from trusting life to resisting life. When we do this, we cut ourselves off from the very process that brings abundance in the first place.
This is what we call a scarcity mindset, but at its core, it’s really just a misunderstanding of reality caused by the way we identify with EGO instead of our realness.
Scarcity vs. Flow: The Misperception That Holds Us Back
A scarcity mindset isn’t about how much we do or don’t have – it’s about how we perceive reality.
When we’re ‘stuck’ in scarcity, we normally do one of two things:
- We cling to what we have:
- We hold on too tightly to money, relationships, status, or opportunities, fearing they won’t come again.
- This just leads to anxiety, control issues, and a resistance to change.
- We hold on too tightly to money, relationships, status, or opportunities, fearing they won’t come again.
- We become impatient about what we don’t have:
- We focus obsessively on what’s missing and feel frustrated that it hasn’t arrived yet.
- This creates desperation, self-doubt, and an inability to enjoy the present. It also stops us being able to TRUST ourselves and life (on a long enough timeline).
- We focus obsessively on what’s missing and feel frustrated that it hasn’t arrived yet.
Both of these reactions take us out of reality and wholeness and cause us to cling to fragmented beliefs and ideas:
Instead of aligning with life’s natural flow, we either try to pause it (by holding on) or fast-forward it (by forcing things to happen). Both of these, of course, are absolutely impossible because real life keeps moving (these two things – pausing and fast-forwarding – are just a lack of acceptance in the form of the ego’s control freakery).
The truth is actually quite simple, though:
Real abundance isn’t something to be held or chased – it’s something to be TRUSTED.
The Secret to Abundance: Trusting the Tide
If we truly understand the rhythms of life, we stop fearing the natural ebb and flow:
Just as the tide goes out but always comes back in, abundance follows the same pattern:
- Sometimes we have more, sometimes we have less – but the underlying process of flow that creates abundance is always there.
- Sometimes opportunities flood in, sometimes there’s a quiet pause – but the flow is always moving and if we can TRUST and be patient then what we need will show itself.
- Sometimes life feels full, sometimes it feels empty – but balance is always being restored as we go through natural cycles of TENSION and RELEASE.
Abundance isn’t about hoarding or rushing (both of those are symptomatic of a scarcity mindset) – it’s about trusting that as long as we stay open to the flow, everything we need will arrive in its time.
This is why gratitude and trust are so powerful.
- When we’re grateful for what we have now, we’re flowing with the tide instead of resisting it. This is because gratitude puts us in a state of acceptance and acceptance always means that we’re seeing reality clearly (and abundance is just part of what’s real – look around you!).
- When we trust that what we need is on its way, we stop grasping and allow the cycle to unfold naturally. Thgis means that we will reach out for the things that are REAL for us, rather than things we just think we need because of F.E.A.R (“False Evidence Appearing Real”) and desperation.
The short-version is this:
Life is balance in process. Go with it.
How to Live in Abundance Every Day
Understanding these ideas is one thing – living them is another; here’s how you can start integrating the flow of abundance into your daily life:
1. Pay Attention to the Rhythms in Your Own Life
Just like nature has its cycles, so does everything else:
- Your finances will have seasons of growth and quiet.
- Your energy levels will have days of high productivity and days of rest.
- Your relationships will have moments of deep connection and moments of space.
Instead of panicking when something ebbs, recognise that it’s part of a cycle. The tide will return because “what goes up must come down”.
Ask yourself: Where am I resisting a natural rhythm in my life? What would happen if I trusted the process instead?
You know if you’re resisting a natural rhythm because you will feel unnatural friction.
2. Shift from Hoarding to Flowing
If you tend to cling to what you have, try loosening your grip:
- If you’re scared to spend money, give a little away and trust that more will come.
- If you’re holding on too tightly to a relationship, allow some space and see how the connection deepens naturally.
- If you’re hoarding ideas or creativity out of fear they’ll run out, express them freely and watch how inspiration continues to flow.
Ask yourself: What am I holding onto out of fear? How can I start trusting the tide instead?
We cling because we don’t believe that something really belongs with us. This is almost always because we’re driven by SHAME instead of anything REAL.
3. Replace Impatience with Trust
If you tend to fixate on what you don’t have yet, practice letting go of urgency:
- Instead of stressing about why something hasn’t happened, remind yourself: “Everything that’s REAL unfolds in its time”
- Instead of forcing an outcome, focus on what you can do today to stay in flow. This is where you have the most influence anyway (in the process, not on the result).
- Instead of obsessing over when things will come, practice trusting that they will.
Ask yourself: What am I trying to force? What would happen if I relaxed and let it unfold?
When we don’t TRUST ourselves or life, then we try to RUSH but life is too short to rush.
4. Cultivate a Daily Practice of Gratitude
Gratitude isn’t just about feeling good – it’s a practical tool for staying in flow by cultivating ACCEPTANCE. The more you appreciate what’s already here, the more you align with the rhythm of abundance on the way to whatever comes along next.
Try this:
- Every morning, list three things you’re grateful for.
- Every night, reflect on one way life provided for you that day without you even doing anything (even in small ways).
- Throughout the day, whenever you notice scarcity creeping in, shift your focus to something you already have and are grateful for.
💡 Ask yourself: Where is abundance already present in my life? How can I tune into that more?
An attitude of gratitude keeps you in reality and out of the ego.
5. Let Go and Trust the Bigger Process
At the heart of all of this is trust – trusting that life knows what it’s doing, that you are supported, and that abundance is always flowing, even when you can’t see it yet.
Whenever doubt creeps in, remember:
The tide goes out but it always comes back .
And that’s the rhythm you were always meant to move with.
Final Thoughts: Abundance Is Already Yours
You don’t have to chase abundance; you don’t have to hoard it; you don’t have to F.E.A.R losing it.
Abundance is already part of the fabric of life – t’s in the tides, in the changing seasons, in the natural flow of everything around you.
If you trust the process and align yourself with gratitude, patience, and flow, you’ll realise that abundance was never something you had to fight for. It’s something that’s received, not achieved.
It was always there – moving, shifting, returning; all you have to do is let go and move with it.
Stay real out there,
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