ego - Page 5

Your Emotional ‘Stuff’ Clouds Your Assumptions, Thoughts, and Beliefs and Blinds You to Possibility.

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Life never goes anywhere. Reality never changes.

What does change is our INTERPRETATIONS and PERCEPTIONS and those are affected by our relationship with ourselves first and foremost.

If there’s too much DARKNESS within us – especially darkness that we try to hide from ourselves – then the world becomes claustrophic and restricted.

If we can open up to the LIGHT within us – especially the light that’s SCREAMING to be released – then the world becomes more spacious and we can BREATHE.

The problem for a lot of people is that they’re running around telling themselves that they’re ‘happy’ when they’re not.

They’re telling themselves that this is the life they want to be living, but they know deep down that it isn’t and that whispering such things to themselves over and over again is just a COPE.

Often, this is simply because they have never really ASKED THEMSELVES what it is they want to be spending their time doing – life is short but it’s also a bitch (or so they’ve been told) and then you die.

They might as well just TOLERATE what they’ve been given instead of going out there and TAKING what’s waiting for them.

Other times, it’s not the world that’s holding us back as much as it is OURSELVES (though even when the world holds us back it’s usually because we LET it).

The reason we hold ourselves back is ALWAYS because our assumptions, thoughts, and beliefs have become UNREAL.

On a deeper level, these unreal assumptions, thoughts, and beliefs always stem from our UNRESOLVED emotional ‘stuff’.

It goes like this:

Emotions -> Assumptions about self/world/reality -> Thoughts -> Beliefs

Normally, the things that most affect us are the Unholy Trinity of shame, guilt, and/or trauma but these may also manifest as other emotions like anger, sadness, frustration, or self-loathing.

Whatever it is that you’re FEELING changes the amount of LIGHT that you allow yourself to shine on yourself and the world in reality.

If you become too CLOUDED, then you only end up seeing the problems in your life and being BLIND to all of the possibilities.

Your task is to reverse engineer your beliefs so that you can DIG OUT the assumptions you carry that are SCREWING you.

 

 

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Love is a Destructive Force as Much as it is a Creative One

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If you don’t believe in ‘true’ love, then I feel (a bit) sorry for you.

Yeah, I can be a bit cyncial and dark about the world sometimes but in the HEART of every cynic is somebody who’s tasted the TRUTH about life and either lost it or seen that the world is against it.

We can all taste the FRUIT of truth in various ways in our lives – finding the edge, dancing with loss, getting close to death, or just having conversations that bring moments of insight that make us go ‘aha’ and blow our minds a little more.

For most of us, though, the realest thing we’ll experience in our lifetimes is LOVE – when you find that somebody who actually opens doors…not just to life itself but to you and your own REALNESS.

They don’t even need to try that hard…it just kinda happens in the animal MAGNETISM and state of PRESENCE that exists between you.

When you’re in love the world seems like a totally different and BETTER place… The cynics like me might say that it’s only because you’re INFATUATED and so you’re not seeing yourself, the world, or reality clearly – you’re just filtering everything through the distortions of all that OXYTOCIN (the ‘love’ hormone).

You’re not, though, you’re seeing things as they really are and life as it truly is because love UNBLOCKS you and distances you from your own BULLSHIT.

People also say that “love hurts” but that’s BULLSHIT too – love can NEVER hurt because love is just a connection to the TRUTH and the truth is always the source of all comfort and JOY in our lives.

The thing that ‘hurts’ is the journey back to the truth as we go through the process of LOSING OUR ILLUSIONS and trying to cling to them.

This is why love is both creative and destructive:

It’s creative because it connects you to TRUTH which is the source of all creation.

It’s destructive because your journey back to the truth is limited by your attachement to and DEFENSE of your illusions.

The more you cling, the worse it gets – this is why people become cynical and anti-love: because they went in with their EGO and not what’s real about them (which can only lead to DRAMA).

May you kill you inner cynics and grow REAL.

?

 

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You Don’t Need to Force Anything to Get Where You Need to Be

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Forcing life to happen in the way that you want it to happen is alway UNREAL.

In real life and nature, NOTHING is forced:

-The grasss doesn’t force itself to grow.

-The trees don’t force themselves to produce fruit or to blow in the wind.

-The clouds don’t force themselves to burst open when it’s time to let the rains out.

-The birds don’t have to force themselves to fly away for the winter.

Everything just happens exactly when it’s supposed to happen – in fact, you could go even further than that and say that it’s beyond any idea of ‘supposed to’ and more accurately we can say “stuff just happens”.

The problem – or difference – of course, is that all of these natural phenomena haven’t been blessed with the ‘extra’, higher-level faculties that human beings have:

-They don’t have human reason.

-They don’t have human drives.

-They don’t have human fears, prides, or desires.

-They don’t have human tendencies to compare or to resist.

-Etc.

All of these things are part of our human NATURE but – if misused – they take us away from nature and life at the same time.

The way we ‘misuse’ them is by using them to turn away from the nature of ourselves and reality and towards the fragmentations and divisions of ‘the world’ (really, just a set of ideas that we project over the truth because of our individual and collective ‘stuff’).

When we turn away like this, we forget that we are CONNECTED to nature and its natural processes and we start to think that we’re of the world alone (which is never reality or nature because those things aren’t just ideas – they’re experiences).

The more attached we become to the world, the more our identity becomes invested in the things that we need to happen in the world to keep that identity in place.

The more we need the world to be real, the more we try and FORCE the things we want in the world to happen – every time we do this, though, we make the choice for fragmentation over wholeness and disconnect ourselves from the process of letting things HAPPEN.

Step back from the world, admit you don’t know everything, and let NATURE work with you.

As the tree brings forth fruit so shall you.

 

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Take the ‘Whatever’ Pill: Trust and Believe You Can Handle Whatever Comes Next.

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There’s the blue pill, the red pill, and then the big boy: the WHATEVER pill.

You take the blue pill and you stay in your little day dream… The MATRIX of your ego and a sense of disconnection and restlessness as you hide your SHADOW ‘stuff’ from yourself and ‘live’ in your own comfort zone.

You take the red pill and you wake up… You get AWARENESS of the truth about life and how things work – you can see through the VEILED VEIL (of your limited perception and interpretation).

AWARENESS will only take you so far though… Yeah, you can see and UNCOVER the truth but unless you actually work to ACCEPT the truth and then ACT on it then you’re cutting yourself of from your potential and the excitement of living and being connected to the REAL WORLD.

There are two things you need to do to live a REAL life:

1. Uncover the truth
2. Live the truth

To do this you have to walk the road from AWARENESS to ACCEPTANCE to ACTION (and then keep walking it going deeper into the truth each time).

It works EVERY time but it won’t work if you only become ‘aware’.

The final pill is the WHATEVER PILL and you can only take it if you’ve gained enough awarness and acceptance to TRUST and BELIEVE in yourself NO MATTER WHAT (because you’ve become unshakeable – see my post on abundance mindset).

When you truly trust and believe you’re ready for anything that comes next because you know you can HANDLE it in the sense of not being shaken from yourself and true SELF-ACCEPTANCE.

When people don’t take the WHATEVER pill then they become too SCARED of RISK to do what they really want to do with their lives.

They become scared to go out there and take ACTION because they fear the CONSEQUENCES of self-perceived failure or having people say things about them or whatever else their ego and its fears can convince them of and project forward int an UNKNOWN future.

When you project these hypothetical ‘what ifs’ forward without taking the WHATEVER PILL then you forget that you’ll still be capable of TRUSTING AND BELIEVING no matter what so no consequences really matter.

You can handle it.

Take the WHATEVER PILL and it gives you the superpower of knowing that you can handle WHATEVER is next.

 

 

 

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Self-Judgement is Always Learned. It’s Not Your Natural State.

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Judging yourself (or anybody) isn’t your natural state.

It might feel ‘natural’ if you’ve just taken it onboard as part of your personality but that’s just because you’ve got used to that voice in your head following you around and analysing your every move.

There’s an old saying in coaching that if somebody spoke to you like you spoke to yourself in your head then you’d probably end up smacking them and you’d – at the very least – tell them to STFU.

Because that judgemental voice or ‘inner critic’ has become part of our daily routine we’ve just got used to it and allowed it to continue its business – in many cases, we even end up thinking that the voice is who we are.

The TRUTH is that you picked up that voice somewhere in the outside world and it’s caused you to be disconnected from yourself, the world by extension, and any semblance of REALITY.

In most cases, this voice came from a CRITICAL PARENT or some ‘AUTHORITY’ FIGURE like a disagreeable teacher or something.

In other cases, it might be from old ‘friends’ or peers from the past who were projecting their own ‘stuff’ onto you and because of whatever shame, guilt, and/or trauma you were carrying you decided to take it on as the actual ‘truth’ about you.

The FACT is that if you’re running around all day judging yourself then you don’t understand who you are and you don’t understand REALITY.

The reality is that you are beyond the judgement of other human beings because no other human being can comprehend the truth about where you are, what you did to get there, and where you’re going.

When you find yourself in a hypnotic state of self-judgement it means that you’ve taken UNREAL standards from the outside world as being your REAL VALUES and INTENTIONS (which are always from a place of WHOLENESS when you’re real because reality is WHOLE).

These standards always show up as ‘shoulds’ about ourselves or the world.

Self – “I SHOULD be/do/have [what I’m told, not what I INTEND]

World – “I SHOULD fit into a certain [box/script/pattern/etc]”

The reality is you don’t NEED to do anything except accept where you are and where you want to be .

Move towards WHOLENESS and judgement slips by the wayside.

 

 

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Real Men and Women are Rare.

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If you find a REAL one, you better keep it in your life.

In a world where everybody is confused by consumption and where the boundaries between people have become enmeshed, it’s rare to meet somebody who can embody their NATURAL energy and the power that comes with it.

Everybody is obsessed with SEX but few are capable of understanding their own sexuality or the SENSUAL nature of how it expresses itself.

Everybody is obsessed with the POWER that the world has over them and how they might best bow down to it or find new labels to hide behind (as an expression of their POWERLESSNESS) but few are ready to express the power that already flows through them.

Real MEN and WOMEN are a rarity in an unreal world because the world is built to curtail the spirit of real human beings.

We have been CONDITIONED to be scared of anything that’s DIFFERENT
– despite endless talk about diversity, etc- and to become the same kind of SAME OLD:

-Endless consumers that live from the outside-in.

-Playing it safe and not wanting to offend anybody (which you don’t have to purposely do but can’t avoid if you’re growing real in an unreal world).

-Being passive instead of active because of learned helplessness or a failure to realise that responsibility is the key to personal and collective freedom.

In a world that’s asked us all to be the ‘same’ instead of truly EQUAL – in terms of the opportunities that are available to us and the respect we bestow upon each other, the world just becomes insipid and BLAND and people become disconnected from their true purpose.

A REAL WOMAN is not to be fucked with – she has the power to show you what the EARTH is all about and who you really are in the face of her grasp of life.

A REAL MAN can stand his ground in the face of this unleashing of life and to shape the world around the human values that support this life in a sustainable way.

When these two forces come together new worlds – and the humans that populate them – are literally built and anything unreal has to collapse in the furnace of the truth they share.

To tap into your NATURE and harness the power it brings is the rarest thing in an unnatural, unreal world.

 

 

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“So What?” is a Secret Weapon Against Shame, Guilt, and Anxiety.

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Everything changes and life keeps flowing.

If you flow with it, you tend to feel ‘good’; if you weigh yourself down with the tension of your own unreal THOUGHTS and IDEAS then you feel ‘bad’.

Things can happen to us on the surface of our lives but we also have the power to DEAL WITH them by taking a breath, remembering who the frick we are, and reminding ourselves of the age old truth:

WHAT IS REAL ABOUT US IS ALWAYS REAL ABOUT US.

In our realness, we are whole – if you can accept that then you don’t need to let the world shake you from yourself because you know you’re UNSHAKEABLE.

The problem is that we pick up ideas from outside of ourselves that stop us experiencing life as it really is.

Often, these ideas start off as SIGNALS that we’re heading on to the wrong path – sometimes, that’s fine because we need the signal as a NUDGE back to reality.

Signals are supposed to be TEMPORARY, though, so if we allow them to LINGER then we end up treating the signal as the reality (whereas in truth the signal is pointing us back to reality) and it causes all kinds of conceptual confusion.

A few common signals are shame, guilt, and anxiety – in some cases, they may just be a TEMPORARY nudge to remind us that we’re acting out of alignment with our true values and intentions.

If the signal LINGERS or is FORCED UPON US by others, then something unreal is going on and we need to whack out the secret weapon:

“SO WHAT?”

This is a simple tool that helps you circumvent your own programming:

Shame – shame lingers when you believe a lingering INTERNAL signal that you’re no ‘good’.

SO WHAT? You’re whole.

Guilt – guilt lingers when you believe a lingering EXTERNAL signal that you’re actions are no ‘good’.

SO WHAT? They can’t JUDGE your intentions.

Anxiety – anxiety lingers when you start to believe unreal hypothetical signals about the future “What if…?”.

SO WHAT? You’ll still accept yourself anyway.

If any of these emotions linger you have a problem with 1) your ideas, and 2) your identity.

There’s only the truth which is that you’re beyond judgement and that you have nothing to fear if you trust and believe in your own unshakeable connection to the WHOLE.

 

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Everything is the Best Thing that Ever Happened to You.

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This is a bitter pill to swallow but life is absolutely amazing.

Somehow – against all the odds – you managed to win the cosmic battle and to end up in a MEAT SUIT (but don’t worry, your body is nothing without you) on a habitable planet 93,000,000 million miles away from a ball of fire, spinning around at 1000mph, and getting to be AWARE of the whole experience.

Yeah, you’re gonna die one day but actually that’s just frickin’ amazing too because it means that EVERY single moment of your life is just a thread in the tapestry of consciousness and that – as you get closer to the end – each moment becomes even more PRECIOUS in its rarity.

The odds of you being here breathing and flowing and growing with life are literally ASTRONOMICAL – you’re connected to everything and everything’s connected with yout and then….poof: you become one with it.

We can easily forget all the things that we’re BLESSED with because we get DRAGGED into the clown world day-after-day:

-Sleepwalking politicians that lie and dodder in their old age as ASLEEP as they’ve always been.

-Drama and BS from economic GRUNTS that believe all the BS that created them (media, education system, ‘society’, movies and TV, etc).

-The ‘System’ that some how convinced you you’re here to work 9-5 until you’re 70 and then enjoy a few years of retirement.

None of that stuff is ‘REAL’.

Your REAL LIFE is who you are when you look at that sunset.

It’s who you are when you MAKE LOVE to somebody you care it about.

It’s the version of you that’s laughing your ass off so much your belly hurts and you have tears streaming down your face.

It’s you when you’re on FIRE and your soul is ABLAZE because you’re in the zone and your identity has been cast aside with all fear and you flow like a goddam force of NATURE.

The thing is – despite the cage of the CLOWN WORLD and all its BS – EVERYTHING that ever happens in your life is the best thing that happened to you.

Everything that happens – heartbreak, BS, loss, WHATEVER – is a lesson in ACCEPTANCE and the only thing you can ever accept is that you’re HERE, you’re NOW, and that you’re ALIVE.

Stop resisting and start ACCEPTING – because life is AWESOME.

 

 

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Focusing Too Much On Your Healing Makes You Sick

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Over-identifying with anything makes you sick.

Everything in life is about BALANCE and finding peace as you walk the tightrope between tension and release:

What goes UP must come DOWN and that applies in ALL areas of our lives – if we get too caught up in the PERCEIVED importance of something then it just ends up taking us into the realm of ILLUSIONS.

All illusions bring TENSION and – on a long enough timeline – that tension always finds a way to be released…whether you’re ready for it or not.

One area where people can bring unnecessary tension to their lives is in the area of their own ‘healing’.

This is a tricky realm because as soon as you identify with healing you also identify with its opposite – ‘sickness’.

We can say this because ‘healing’ and ‘sickness’ leave us stuck on the two horns of the same bull of DUALITY – in other words, it brings us to the realm of value judgments and ideas about life instead of life itself in all its REALNESS (which is beyond dualism and the ideas of ‘good’ and ‘bad’).

The truth about life as it unfolds on the VEILED MATRIX of the conceptual is that:

“EVERYTHING CONTAINS THE SEEDS OF ITS OPPOSITE” (Personal Revolutions).

We may like to believe that life is a simple case of black and white opposites like ‘good’ and ‘bad’ or ‘healed’ and ‘sick’ but it never is – it’s SHADES OF GREY and you can never have one without embracing the other.

If you become OBSESSED or too focused on your ‘healing journey’ then all you really end up doing is reminding yourself that you’re SICK (or why else would you be on the journey).

Every time you do that yoga workout for the sake of releasing your trauma, you’re reminding yourself that the sickness is there.

Every time you try and be ‘vulnerable’ and start spilling your guts out, you’re reminding yourself of your own (perceived) weakness.

The TRUTH is that you don’t need to DO ANYTHING to be healed – you just need to let go of the IDEAS that make you believe in your own sickness.

Nor do you need anybody else to ‘heal’ you – that’s impossible because anybody who thinks they’re your ‘healer’ must be sick too (because of duality).

The only sickness is EGO (and that’s never REAL).

 

 

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Obsession Will Send You to the Nut House but Devotion Will Take You Home

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Nothing in this world is worth being obsessed over.

The word ‘obsess’ goes back to late Middle English when it meant to be “haunted or possessed by an evil spirit”.

Maybe that’s still an apt description because when people are caught up in the throes of obsession not only do they lose themselves and their minds but they’ve also given themselves over to some dark power in themselves.

Obsession is UNREAL because it always has the EGO involved – in other words, the only reason anybody would be obsessed with anything is because of some FALSE IMAGE of themselves, the world, or reality.

The ‘evil spirits’ driving this obsession are usually just our unresolved emotional ‘stuff’ (in the form of shame, guilt, and or trauma and the FEAR and/or ANGER that accompanies these demons).

If you’re OBSESSED with something it means that you’re denying parts of yourself (because they’re hidden in your SHADOW) and so you project out certain qualities or ambitions onto the object of your obsession (aka ‘a Unicorn’ – see my book Shadow Life).

The most common things people become obsessed with are:

-Other people, especially in RELATIONSHIPS where we trick ourselves into thinking somebody is the answer to all our prayers (really just our ego’s way of protecting it’s illusions so we don’t have to grow through shadow) instead of growing REAL with them.

-Our own goals, because we’ve become OUTCOME-DEPENDENT and think we can only love ourselves if we attain whatever that goal is.

-The past, because we haven’t been able to find CONCEPTUAL closure and so our brain races around as the demons feed on our energy.

-Certain hobbies or material objects, because we’ve lost touch with our true sense of PURPOSE and need a substitute.

Any OBSESSION will eventually drive you CRAZY because it’s unreal.

If you wanna be REAL, you need to find a relationship, goal, or sense of purpose that you can be DEVOTED to.

The word ‘devotion’ means to make HOLY (WHOLE).

If the ego is made of FRAGMENTS then obsession is just about being further DIVIDED and detached from life because obsession is ego to the extreme.

Devotion is about dedicating yourself to what’s WHOLE in yourself, the world, and REALITY.

 

 

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